1997: Pre-Thanksgiving Build Up

From the archives: It turns out that I was blogging long before anyone had ever heard the term “blog.” Twenty years ago I was an exchange student in Estonia. While studying at the University of Tartu, I created an online travelogue to keep my family and friends apprised of my experiences. Both my life and the nation of Estonia have changed a lot the two decades since. This reprise is providing me with a glimpse at who I was back then and the excuse to learn more about more recent developments in my temporary home, even if some of the opinions that I expressed back then may make me a little bit uncomfortable today. It is interesting to see how people grow and change.

Previous entry: Still Catching Up

November 10-23, 1997

Since I’ve been trying to get caught up recently I have been doubling my journal weeks. This entry is no exception. In many ways it also makes my life easier as I only have to do all of the page setup and layout kind of stuff once rather than twice. That saves an incredible amount of time and effort. I’m not sure whether it will continue this way, but that’s how it stands for the time being.

Anyway, these were a very exciting couple of weeks. I have really started to get into the difficult study portion of the semester and sometimes the craziness of it all has failed to make into these pages. For that I apologize. The most important single event of the past two weeks has been the planning and preparation of a Thanksgiving party to be held, with the help of another American, in Manhattan, one of the local restaurant/bars. It’s taken a lot of time and nerves, especially as the time has drawn nearer. We’ll have to see how it goes. Next week is the big day.

10 November 1997
Monday

Today we began our new Estonian reading course. I think that this course will be a little better than the conversation course. I know much more Estonian language now than I before and am much more able to say and communicate exactly what I want to say.

Tonight Nuri and watched X-Files here and I got to meet Kairit’s new cat, Sussi. Very cute.

11 November 1997
Tuedsay

This evening I had a little get together here at home with the members of my tutor group, or what’s left of it. We had a lot of fun talking and relaxing. It was incredible to catch up after all this time. I didn’t do as much socializing as the last time we got together, but as host, there was a little more pressure involved as well. I truly enjoyed hosting. I think that we surprised Enne with how quiet, simple and short the get together was. If she was sufficiently impressed I think that we might be able to do this again.

I am going to start switching back into English in my journal more and more. Simple daily narratives will continue to be in Estonian, but the thoughts and feelings that I am experiencing are too valuable to lose on account of language problems. There is a place for language exercise, and I will continue to practice, but it will not come at the expense of recording this incredible experience for the future.

A most fulfilling day. The best in a long while. A well-earned sleep just minutes away.

13 November 1997
Thursday

I sometimes wonder just where exactly my life is going, but when I come right down to it, it is going exactly where the Lord wants it to go. I may not understand everything that happens in this world, but I really don’t have to. Everything will be made clear to me at the right time. It’s just a matter of waiting and watching.

Today was a good day. After classes I went to tutor Jane for the first time since she got back from her trip to Germany. It went fairly well, but I think that Silvi has kind of dropped out of the tutoring loop. I hope that she has not left for any serious reason and hope that she knows she is always welcome to come back. Tonight I caught up with one week of my homepage. I must keep going, there is still a long way to go. I must learn not to let myself get behind and bogged down like this. I am much happier when I am creating and sharing rather than reading, watching television and simply consuming information. I am a creator and must learn to always use my talents. The Lord gave them to me for a reason, after all. How did I get so blessed?

13 November 1997
Friday

A great evening. I went to a birthday party for Bernadette, one of the Hungarian students, in the dormitories. We had a wonderful time and afterwards went out to Zavood and Krooks with Silke, Jerry and company. It was nice, I had a theological discussion in Estonian and didn’t have to buy a beer all night. In fact, the only money I spent today was for the cab ride home. I love it when other people buy my drinks. The key is to have generous friends. A good night.

17 November 1997
Monday

I was at home all day today. I made it almost all of the way through the new magazine I bought. Unfortunately my problem with uncontrolled reading started to come back to the surface. Either I am not reading at all or I am reading incessantly without any concern for what is going on around me. I must learn to work on that.

After everyone cam back home I did some translation work for the International Student Office from Estonian into English. Even though I had a lot of help from Kairit and Eike at the beginning, I finished it up entirely on my own. A good feeling. I think that everything turned out really well. What a sensation.

18 November 1997
Tuesday

This evening I went with Diemo and Nuri to an “alternative Christian rock music” concert. It was alright, definitely nothing special, but a good time and worth every cent that I paid for it, considering that I got a ticket free with some books that I bought at an Estonian Evangelical Students Union book sale last week. After the concert we went to McDonald’s and indulged in some serious artery clogging. A good way to waste an hour, and thirty crowns.

19 November 1997
Wednesday

After class today I stopped by the dormitories, while I was there I got invited along to a “Smilers” concert. It was a great concert, the best Estonian music group that I have ever seen. A good night.

20 November 1997
Thursday

I decided not to go to the movies tonight after all and enjoyed my first quiet night at home in a long time. It was wonderful to relax and I actually got some work done that I have been putting off for way too long. The biggest thing is that I am starting to get ready for the Thanksgiving party coming up next week. I can’t believe that holiday is only a week away. Here I am half a word away from my home and the people I love. It just doesn’t feel real. Sometimes I miss home so much, other times I don’t even think about it. The bittersweet sensations of the life that I am leading. What a trip.

23 November 1997
Sunday

I wish that all my days could be this exciting and eventful. Then again, perhaps not, I’m not sure that my body could handle it. I have been running nonstop for nearly sixteen hours. It is definitely time for a rest.

I started with worship services, again with Diemo, at the Elu Sõna (Word of Life) Church in Tartu. Neither Diemo or I had ever been to a pentecostal church before. It was an intriguing experience. Four hours long and entirely devoid of any deep theological content this was definitely not the church for me. However there was the power of the Holy Spirit there. I think that, as has become my standard inter-church response here in Estonia, while I cannot agree with them on some major points, on others we match perfectly. This shows the reasons behind so many different denominations in Christianity, many interpretations and reactions to the same God. What does not work for me works for someone else. As long as God is the one that is praised, where’s the harm?

After church Diemo and I went to McDonald’s with some people from the congregation. It was a wonderful couple of hours discussion. It’s amazing how similar basic beliefs from people such totally different denominational and cultural backgrounds really are. I think that C.S. Lewis was right in writing his book Mere Christianity. The basics are all the same…

Following the McDonald’s time, Diemo and I came back here for tea and pasta. As usual, the talk lasted a wonderfully long time and covered a wide range of subjects, although theology was the most prevelent. Yes, we can talk about something else, but it can be quite difficult sometimes. There are worse things that could happen, though.

The night ended at the home of Rafael, the Carribean-American artist with whom I have been planning the Thanksgiving party. Last night I was more than a little frightened by our lack of advertising. I feared that no one would come simply because no one knew abut it. I even came within a sentence or two of saying, “let’s forget it.” The last thing I wanted was to lose money over a flopped party.

The Lord does provide, however, and now after an evening of poster creation I finally have some confidence in the success of the party. We will still have to work like crazy, but it should not be too bad. As Rafael said tonight, “Shakespeare was right, ‘all’s well that end’s well’.” We’re not there yet, but we have now taken a giant leap forward.

Next entry: Thanksgiving Week