COVID comes home
A Christmas call none of us wanted to get
On Christmas day we received that my dad, who is dealing with dementia, had been moved into isolation in the care center where he lives. This news changed everything about our holiday plans. We ended up making a last minute trip to Iowa, spent time coordinating his care with family, and even got a brief to visit him face to face.
These are updates I shared with the congregation:
Sunday, December 27, 2020
On Christmas Day we found out my dad has been moved to isolation in the care center where he lives. He is extremely weak and far more confused than normal when I spoke to him on the phone.
They gave him a barrage of tests ranging from UTI to COVID. We are waiting for the results right now. Please keep him, my step mom, the rest of the family, the medical staff, and the other residents at Calvin Community in your prayers this weekend.
Monday, December 28, 2020
His results came back. He tested positive for COVID19. So far no problems breathing, but he is still weak and confused on the phone. He is in isolation at the care center.
Thank you all for keeping him and everyone caring for him in your prayers.
Tuesday, December 29, 2020
After my dad tested positive for COVID19 yesterday, the board of the church offered me the opportunity for a bit of leave. For the next few days I am going to be out of pocket to be available for my family in whatever way I can.
Thank you to everyone who has been offering your prayers and support. Please also continue to pray for Bobby, Mark, and everyone else in our community who is affected by the virus.
Thursday, December 31, 2020
Update on dad: Still much weaker than at the beginning of the week, but more responsive today. Cough continues. Special treat today: Nathan and Leanne had some of his favorite Chinese food delivered for lunch. He really enjoyed that. Most importantly: very grateful for all the care that Lois, Leanne, Nathan and all the staff at Calvin Community have been providing him though this difficult time.
Tuesday, January 5, 2021
Some good news today. Dad’s lungs are starting to sound better. The nurses were unable to hear any noise when he breathed. He continues to be weak, but they are optimistic that he is pointed in the right direction.
This weekend Lily and I got a chance to see him face to face. We had to go through a medical screening before being allowed in. We wore protective jackets, gloves, a face shield, and double masks. It was the best conversation I have had with him in months. The face to face interaction allowed him to stay more focused than he is able to do on the phone. It was, frankly, bittersweet. It was great to see him, but the visit was only possible because of how serious his condition is.
He is still weak, but at least he seems to be making a bit of slow, steady, progress. Because of the visit we are going to have to stay quarantined for a while. Fortunately, since the signs are better, we decided it would be easier and cheaper to quarantine at home instead of in a hotel in Iowa.
At this moment there is no longer a need to be just a few minutes away in case he were to have an emergency overnight. We arrived back here in Missouri earlier today. I’m going to start doing church work from home tomorrow, but will be prepared to return to Des Moines in the event anything changes.
Huge thanks to our church for the prayers and for the time away. This was a difficult, but important, trip. The first several days were spent coordinating care with my brother, step mom, and the nursing home. Even though we had an advanced directive set up, COVID changes everything. There were new decisions to make all the time. Nothing was simple because of both the virus and my dad’s dementia.The silver lining of all of this is that my dad is getting good care and our family is all on the same page in terms of how to proceed. By no means is he out of the woods, but today’s news has been good.
Thank you for all the prayers for not only our family, but also everyone else in Dexter who is dealing with this difficult virus.
Thursday, January 7, 2021
It was one of the most emotionally challenging weeks we had been through in a long time. Simply making the decisions necessary for something like this is exhausting. Not being able to talk to him or get his input makes things hard. Additionally, the realities of dementia mean that any potential treatments or relocations could potentially have serious unintended consequences.
Fortunately, at the moment things are looking better for him. He still has a long ways to go, but at least his breathing better and sitting up in a chair for the first time. In many ways, we were lucky. He is blessed with good care and a dedicated staff in the care center. Most importantly, our family is all on the same page in terms of his care.
My heart goes out to all those who do not have such advantages while trying to battle this virus. It also breaks for all those whose loved ones were not as fortunate as we were. I pray for comfort for everyone who is grieving as well as perseverance for all our nation’s medical personnel. They are overwhelmed, tired, and hurting as much as anyone in this terrible time, yet they still get up everyday and provide amazing care to people like my dad.
Medical professionals, thank you all for everything you do.
